Flying low
I was on the bus this morning, as is my wont. I was thoroughly engrossed in Corrina Corrina, contemplating that Bob can actually sing when he chooses to, and thinking that it is such a lovely, warm, cosy song, when a man got on.
Dear readers, do not worry, that is not the full extent of the story.
He was a very tall man, with studiedly mussed blonde hair and a handsome, if boyish face.
I was sitting down. He was tall. The bus was crowded, and so it was only moments later that I found my little face (I am a little person) directly opposite the charming tall man's Open Flies.
I looked around. Some school girls who were also small (and still are I should think - it was only this morning) had also caught sight of the zipper casually langushing at the bottom of the zip, and they were laughing. He looked slightly perplexed and moved away.
Oh I didn't know what to do! He was now too far for me to mutter it discreetly to him, and I couldn't mime it in front of the rest of this crowded bus. So I sat there helplessly, my mind unwittingly throwing up all the things he might be on his way to do - a job interview, meeting a Lady for coffee, giving An Important Presentation or, heaven forbid, teaching.
About ten minutes later he unzipped first his zippy coat and then his zippy top underneath and I'm afraid to say I snickered.
Then I carried on listening to Voodoo Child. Am I a bad person?
9 comments:
For tittering at the unzipped? Not bad at all Miss Tickle. I too am one of the Little People and often find myself face to face with a strange crotch without the proper introduction. It's quite trying, especially on a morning bus.
"Tittering at the unzipped". That's nice.
Tall, handsome man does striptease in bus, ooh la la.
I have had that same dilemma in the past - but then you wonder if they might think you're weird for looking at their groin area.
In this weather when he went back outside he probably felt a bit of a chill somewhere vital and zipped up. Or got arrested for indecent exposure.
GG: Hello! Oh yes, it happens all the time in London.
rr: I did think that very thought. Especially because I kept looking at the groin area and smiling. I did think he might notice when the bus doors opened, what with the draught and all... But no.
You are a very bad person. You shall go to hell. I shall meet you there. Hurrah!
I am a bad person, I'm not a bad person, what's a girl to believe?
You are indeed a very bad person. Do not pass go. Do not collect £200. And next time, shout across the bus 'Oi, mate, your flies are down'. That will make you a good person. And welcome to my blogroll, by the way x
MM: I will! I will shout at strangers in public and not be ashamed! Hurrah!
(Tarnation. I could have done with £200.)
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